Saturday, October 24, 2009

Creating Space for Growth and's Free

Want and need. Want or need. This is the question. Once you start to ask yourself this question when considering a purchase, it is amazing how much less you actually buy. I work in a world where want usually wins out over need more often than not. Two weeks into my new job where I am surrounded by beautiful things all day long, I wondered if I would be drawn back into my old desires to own them. Sure, it would be nice to see some of these things in my house, but do I need them? No, of course I do not need them. A woman I will call Jewel, came into the showroom today, full of desire to own some more beautiful things for her own home, that admittedly was already full of gorgeous things. She told me her husband did not understand why she needed more things. She told him, "Honey, it has nothing to do with "need", and everything to do with "want". I understood her. I understood her husband. What makes us so illogical? What makes the wanting win out? Why can't we just enjoy looking at the beautiful things and resist the urge to own them? And once we own them, how long before they lose their meaning? We live in such a consumer driven world. Despite the state of the economy, despite the recent consumer caution to spend, the desire to own the beautiful things still drives most of us. It was only a matter of time before the wanter's wants drove them back into the stores in search of that next beautiful thing they felt they just had to own. I am not saying there is anything "wrong" with owning beautiful things (god knows I spent a good portion of my own life in pursuit of them), I'm just asking why? I am at a stage in my life where I want to rid myself of "things". I want to pare down and de-clutter my space, my mind, my body. I crave a sense of simplicity that can only be attained by empty space. Space in my mind, space on my walls, space in my closets, space in my stomach. It is in that space that I will find some room for contemplation, serenity, ease and room for growth. So, as I spend my days surrounded by endless temptation to add, rather than subtract, want, rather than need, I will remind myself that giving into the temptation will not point me in the direction I crave and that inner growth requires room, not more "things". It does not mean I cannot enjoy the scenery along the way, I just don't have to "own" it. I've been heading down this path for some time now, much to the surprise of some people around me who have always known me as a "wanter". Many of those people expected me to be heading into a world of free-fall spending when I took my new job, but I knew the opposite was true. They all asked me - "So, Deb, what kind of staff discount do you get on all the beautiful things?" It had not even occurred to me to ask that question when I was hired. It did not matter to me. It was not why I took the job, nor was it a consideration. This is the new me. The old me would have been anxious to know such information. My biggest concern was how much time I would have for vacation. Their less than satisfactory response was nearly a deal-breaker for me, but I decided to give it a shot anyway. In time I may discover if vacation time is a want or a genuine need. Besides, it may help me. If I have no time off, I will have little time to spend. A win-win I'd say. Maybe.


Cindy Schultz said...

Great post Deb. I need a coffee though.... happy working week. Xo cindy

Anonymous said...

I agree with the broad... impressive posst.... I detect a little opening up, I think that's as impressive as what you have actually said... 9.9/10... I never give full marks :-)

Deb said...

No full marks, eh? The last person who said that to me lived to eat their words. I love it when someone throws down a gauntlet for me - prepare to be dazzled!