Wednesday, May 13, 2009

And the Nobel Prize for Literature goes to.....Anyone but Me!

I took a moment out of my busy day yesterday to pop into The Book Mark, a local independent book store in my neighbourhood. I'll admit I don't buy all my books there, but I like to throw a little business their way in my own wee effort to keep the store alive. I went in without a shopping list in mind, but a book in the window had caught my eye. It was called 50 is the New 50. Not the most clever title, but the subject matter definitely intrigued me and annoyed me at the same time. (like I don't dwell on it enough). That book may have drawn me into the store, but it was not the book I ended up purchasing. Instead, another title, this time with a much more clever title seemed more worthy of my hard-earned dollars. "i never metaphor i didn't like", by Dr. Mardy Grothe. Hmmm, this sounded interesting. It took about 30 seconds of quick flipping to convince me I wanted this fun little volume. With "nearly 2000 feats of association that will entertain, educate, and occasionally inspire quotations lovers everywhere", this baby had my name all over it! Last night, I took a few moments to read through a few pages and came across this little seemingly harmless quote. Then I went back and read it again. And again. OH MY GOD! This does not describe me. Absolutely not. What if people think this is what I think? Because, I promise you, I do not! Here is the quote: "No fathers or mothers think their own children ugly; and this self-deceit is yet stronger with respect to the offspring of the mind." Miguel De Cervantes Of course I am referring to the latter part of this little tidbit of wisdom. I do not in any way shape or form believe that what pours out on to the pages of this blog to be considered anything more than what it is. The rambling, sometimes thoughtful, sometimes amusing, mostly meaningless musings of a middle-aged woman with a voice that has been quiet for too long. The thought that anyone would think that I think I am writing some sort of literary prose is horrific to me. Maybe in about 20 or 30 more years of practice, I may attempt to spit out a novel, but that's all still a messy blur in my mind and in hidden computer files, festering away until the day. (I've always believed I have one in me, but timing is everything) Besides, if I ever do finally crank one out, it's likely to read more like Jeannette Walls, Glass Castle, versus Jane Austen. Trust me, there is zero self-deceit when it comes to my own opinion of my writing. I know how bad it is. Some days, worse than others. Some days, I actually have gone back and deleted a post that I knew was as pathetic as a Brian Mulroney testimony. Like yesterday, I was in a rush and the final post just didn't feel right, or read right and since I was out of time and feeling as overworked as a Ruby Dhalla nannie, I axed it, hopefully before anyone got a chance to see it. That was fun - putting my new book about metaphors, analogies and similes to work! And this is my point. If you are reading this, you are on this journey with me. I graduated from Journalism School in 1985. That was a few years ago. I am rusty, out of practice. I am also reading a fun little book right now called The Downhill Lie by Carl Hiaasen. The story is humorous glimpse inside a man's return to the game of golf after a 32 year absence. For me, writing a daily blog is my return to my field, after a 24 year absence. I never realized how much I missed it, until I started writing again. No two days are alike. I started out wanting to produce something amusing everyday, but that is much harder than I anticipated. So much of what I write is based on emotion and experience and as you can imagine, some days just aren't funny no matter what kind of spin you try to put on it. There was another quote in the book that did strike me as a truth of sorts. Here it is: "Every person's work, whether it be literature or music or pictures or architecture or anything else, is always a portrait of that person." Samuel Butler Everyone has to start somewhere. This blog is my start, or restart or jump start - some kind of start - whatever! "Who I am, is what you get." Debra MacFarlane

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